Jamie McDine's Englishman's guide to what makes Germany different

Part H: When you've got to go!

For OO read WC

Taking the PI$$

You know that feeling, there’s sometimes you’ve just got to go, and getting back to the hotel is no longer an option.

What you'll be looking out for is the 'Klo', 'Toiletten', 'Herren' (or 'Damen') or simply the sign 'OO' (which stems from the loos in hotels normally being near the lift on each floor.  With bedrooms being numbered from the lift, it made the loo room number zero, or OO).

Your options for much needed relief are:

1)      Find some public toilets. Most shopping centres or built-up city centres will have public toilets, but you will be expected to pay for it. Some have a set price which you’ll see as you go in, others expect a donation in the region of 20-30 cents dropped onto a plate on your way out. And there is usually somebody there to make sure you pay! Seems odd having to pay, but the toilets are usually kept spotlessly clean.

2)      Go into a café. Lets face it we’ve all been into McDonalds with the sole intention of using the toilet and not buying anything. Best not to do that in Germany, although with the larger corporates (like McDonalds and Burgerking etc) you could get away with it.

3)      Finding a tree or bush. This is forbidden in Germany and very much frowned upon. Police are really starting to clamp down on it and impose an immediate 50 Euro fine quicker than you can zip up, so best not to do it.

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